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Why is it so easy that I am love and I share love?

This is the question I am living in the energy of after a wonderful Akashic Records reading by the gorgeously gentle Glenda Barber.

In the reading I had a vision of really connecting to source energy and opening my heart, feeling unconditional love flow through me.

I saw a giant hand, big enough for me to step onto, so I did, and sat there in the palm, feeling awe. I slowly became aware that I was being looked at with awe too.

It was such an amazing feeling. Imagine looking at a magnificent sunset – one that is so beautiful it brings you to tears – and then becoming aware that the sunset is in awe of your beauty too.

I can’t unknow this feeling. And my mission now is to infuse even more love into everything I do. I am love and I share love.

This makes it even easier to be okay when there are people who have big “shoulds” judging me. I used to crumble when people judged me. Now I recognise it as their stuff.

It still affects me. My body needs to shake off the trauma of judgement and I can soothe the child parts that need reassurance.

The more we do the inner work of expanding self-compassion, the more easily we’re able to reset ourselves when we need to. We can recognise exactly what we need to do to care for ourselves and take those actions.

Living in the energy of a question is one of those ways of expanding self-compassion… Last night when I lay down to go to sleep, I repeated, “why is it so easy that I am love and I share love?” until I fell asleep.

I don’t need to answer this question. I just need to say it with curiosity and wonder as if it is already true. My subconscious can then get to work on answering the question by making my life reflect it. It might kick up some resistance, which I can release. It gives me actions I can take.

What question would you like to live in the energy of? It has to be something wonderful that you’d love in your live and phrase it as if it’s already happened. Then say the question repeatedly as you go to sleep, and take the actions that occur to you to propel you towards it.

Let me know in the comments what your question is so I can give it some love!

I’d love to help you feel more self-love – wouldn’t that be amazing? Feeling secure and confident? Let’s have a chat about how I can help – book your clarity call – I can’t wait to listen to you!

What’s your favourite way of playing?

This is an old notebook that I repurposed as a collage sketchbook. I love that it has no purpose other than for me to play. It will never be sold or exhibited. It is simply for me to stick things in and doodle on.

I very much enjoyed sticking and doodling yesterday. It’s been a while. I’d gotten into the habit of do, do, doing. This is, of course, self-sabotage. I call this particular saboteur the Hyper Achiever.

The Hyper Achiever saboteur, along with the Avoider saboteur, help me to avoid painful situations or emotions by constantly doing. I’ve made a tool to help you identify your top saboteurs (awareness is the first step to creating change): https://www.subscribepage.com/identifyyoursaboteurs.

I feel like there’s a lot of self-sabotage like this going on for a lot of people at the moment because of all the anxiety created by media messages of fear and judgement around Covid and what we should or shouldn’t be doing.

What helped me was stopping for a few days with a good friend. We played together. We made cacao and had ceremonies, leading into creative activities. It helped me unwind and reflect on where I was at.

I have a business that I love, but my boundaries had loosened around the hours I was putting in. I’m doing a Masters in Creative Psychotherapy and I had not been giving myself time to process from those sessions. Instead I was trying to tune out with TV. I was feeling unhappy about my living arrangement but because of all the other things, I hadn’t felt like there was time to sort that out.

It’s all about priorities and taking regular breaks to check in with myself and be, create, or whatever I need to do to be with myself authentically. So I started playing again. Giving myself space to play without purpose and it feels GREAT! And also to listen to the traumatised parts of me, but that’s another story I’ll tell you another time…

What’s your favourite way of playing? Leave me a comment below and let me know.

Love Julia xxx

P.S. Want to have a chat about how I can help you with embracing your saboteurs (imagine that!)? Let’s jump on a clarity call – you can book yours by clicking this button:

Finding it hard at Christmas? Try sage exquisite attention

I know how hard it can be to be on your own at Christmas (I’ve been there).

I also know how hard it can be to be with others at Christmas (I’ve been there).

Paying exquisite attention to your senses and your breathing can make all of that just a little bit easier and even create amazing connections with yourself and your loved ones. Here’s how:

If you’d like some support with creating amazing connections with yourself and loved ones book your clarity with me and we’ll chat about what you want for yourself and your loved ones in 2022:

Leave me a comment below and let me know how you’re spending your December bank holidays 🙂

Embrace disowned parts of yourself for more ease and flow

Saboteurs hide and silence parts of us that we disowned because it wasn’t safe to allow them to express themselves.

Recognising saboteur behaviour is a step towards embracing disowned parts.

We need supportive, empathic, loving community to do the work of accepting ourselves.

Here’s how I did it with help from my community…

Here’s how I can support you to do the inner work of accepting yourself so you can have more ease and flow in your life, work and relationships:

And if you’d like a clarity call to help you decide how you’d like to work with me, book yours here:

Remember to leave a comment below!

Love, Julia xxx

How mantras transformed my life!

Mantras are excellent ways of using time when you don’t need to think, like when you’re driving, walking, or washing up. You can still do these things mindfully while you say your mantra. One of the mantras I’ve been working with is this:

Infinite Spirit, open the way for my great abundance. I am an irresistible magnet for all that belongs to me by Divine Right.”

Florence Scovel Shinn

The first time I used it, I said it over one hundred times. At first it was just words. Then I noticed I began sitting up straighter. I felt more me somehow. I began using it every day. I said it whilst driving. I found I stopped getting annoyed at other drivers and enjoyed driving even more (I love driving). One day I giggled as I really began to feel into myself as a Divine Being and that there is abundance that belongs to me by Divine Right. I feel powerful in a good way when I say this mantra. 

Mantras help to retrain your brain. Imagine all that time I spent saying the mantra over and over. Now imagine I’d let my mind wander in that time instead, perhaps getting annoyed at other drivers, then replaying some times when I felt annoyed by someone else, and so on. I would have felt grumpy. Our brains do not seem to naturally think of what we want. They dwell on what we don’t want. So giving them something to focus on, like a mantra, primes them for what we want.

My mantra helped me move from a saboteur hijack that only allowed me to begin writing my book (coming soon!) one day a week for 1.5 hours to turning up every weekday for 1.5 hours. It helped me assert my boundaries without question when I needed to. It helped me tune into the sovereignty of being that each of us has by Divine Right and this allowed me to be in sage mode more often and feel more ease and flow.

What is your experience of using mantras?

I love anything that helps me, my clients and the world to be in sage mode and feel more at ease and in flow. I’m really excited to share more with you about this in the upcoming Art of Self-Compassion masterclass series. We start 29th November 2021 with the aim of expanding your self-compassion so you feel more ease and flow in your life, work and relationships. Will I see you there? Click here to register.

How climbing falls helped me feel my feet and overcome trauma

My friend, Sioban, and me at the top of a wall at The Reach, Woolwich.

About 5 years ago, I began climbing. I loved it. I’d go to the local bouldering wall and get lost in the movements and challenges of working out the routes. However, I had a couple of falls where I twisted my ankle. When I returned to climbing I felt very afraid, even on ‘easy’ routes. I used my sage to work out what had happened during those falls. There is a guideline in climbing that you need to have 3 points of contact with the wall for balance. What I noticed was when I took my attention from my feet to my hands, the contact between my feet and the holds was loose. That was why I had slipped. I couldn’t feel my feet.

I wondered about not being able to feel my feet. When walking I often stumbled or stamped. It occurred to me that it was a trauma symptom and stemmed from not being in my body. I designed some experiments. The first was a walking activity. When walking I would focus on feeling my feet. It was hard at first because I was still stumbling and stamping. I felt embarrassed. But when my sage was ‘online’ I could just notice what it was like rather than judge it. I began to notice little sensations in my feet – how they felt inside my shoes and as my shoes made contact with the ground I didn’t need to stamp any more. 

Another experiment was to climb the easiest routes available and pay attention to feeling sensations in my feet as I climbed up and down. I would do each route 4 times, just focusing on my feet. Gradually, I began to trust my feet to hold me, even when I was looking at my hands. I didn’t have to use so much energy to keep paying attention to my feet whilst looking elsewhere. I could pay attention to both my feet and my hands. 

I began to experiment with other areas of my body. I wasn’t aware of my glutes at all. So I began paying attention to that part of me whilst walking and climbing, and even whilst rising from a chair. I felt such joy at feeling these sensations in my body. My body – I felt like I owned my body at long last! I resided in it, it was mine, and I loved it!

Embodiment is just one aspect of being in sage and I’m covering so much more in the upcoming 5 day free masterclass in The Art of Self-Compassion. Join us to expand your ease and flow and have better relationships with yourself and everyone else! Click here to register.